A born Worrier

We all have in built characters and emotions that cumulatively define the kind of person we have and the personality we carry about, for a lot of us these emotions and characters are as a result of past experiences either positive or negative while in other cases they are habits we have learnt ourselves overtime, either in an effort to become a better person or when they come along “just by chance”

While there are people out there who are care and worry free with no iota of fear for the what might come next, I have to say I have to imagine how that must feel like, not in a constant state of worry, calculating, organizing and planning the next big move.

For me, I’m a worrier, as harmless and thoughtful this might sound it tends to go overboard sometimes…OK, a lot of times. Imagine having a mental cramp about things that you have little or no control over. Its time wasting and energy zapping, time that would have gone into channeling some energy into more productive activities are even kicking back and enjoying life is spent worrying on what is yet to come. While I have to agree that it is profitable to have laid out plans and blueprints for success, I also have to say that it is not of an advantage to take up worrying about the laid out plans.

And each time I want to ditch this filthy and heavy coat of worry I see myself picking it up again at the next available chance making my way back to the same rocking chair that makes a lot of motion with no movement.

When I mention my agony to others it is easy for them to drop the “Don’t Worry” slogan, some might even go a bit further and come up with a few other over-washed sayings which don’t seem to have any effect on my predicament. When I try to explain, all I get in response are facial expressions suggesting my questionable mental state or my ingratitude for life.

I don’t see myself as an ingrate or being mentally unstable (or at least I don’t think so), I just see myself as one who worries alot.

Nevertheless, I live my life full hoping one day I would finally succeed in letting go of this filthy coat and taking on life as it comes.